I started my new job today...yay! It's just waiting tables for now but I am so excited to be doing something again!
On a different note: I'm working on a post about my pregnancy and the birth of Jack. Hopefully I can get it out soon.

The Good, The Bad & The Explanation of Body Parts

Ahem. Yes, those body parts.
I have always been very comfortable with my body. With nudity in general and have never had an issue with saying The Words. Vagina. Penis. Pussy. Cock. Whatever. Easy peasy, right?
I've been discriptive with Chloe and her body parts. In the bath when the soaping ensues, I've always named what I'm washing. Neck, arms, elbows, chest, belly, heiny, coochie/vagina (which when she said always came out badina. As in: Mommy, you're washing my badina!) Not really an issue. What I never considered was the impact this would have if I had a boy. The questions regarding his anatomy weren't really what crossed my mind when we found out there another baby on the way. Really, my only thought was, holy fucking shit! Not, how will explain the difference between a vagina and a penis. Which is what I had to do last night.
Oh yeah baby. I actually almost fainted when Chloe grabbed Jack's penis in the bathtub and said "Look at his coochie momma! It's different than mine..?" This of course was after her outburst last week of "Look momma! Jack's grabbing his balls!" Where she heard that and how she knew that, I do not know. I asked and she said "I don't know" The requisite answer to all things these days. I corrected her and said "No honey, They're called testicles. Jack has testicles." Omigawd!!!!
So, the look at his coochie exclamation was coming, I know but still quite shocking!
My answer: Honey you know that you're a girls and that Jack is a boy, right?
C: Yes
Okay, well besides Dna and hormones and such the main difference between boys and girls is, boys have a penis and girls have a vagina. See? Penis. Vagina.
C: Oh. Why?
Okay. Hmm...well. Inside our bodies we have Dna. That makes us who and what we are. That says if we are a boy or a girl. If we have blue eyes or brown eyes. See?
C: Yes (also requisite answer)
Are you sure?
C: No
Okay. Boys have a penis girls have a vagina. therefore, Jack cannot have a coochie. Okay?
C: Okay momma.
Whew!!! I'm sure more talks will be had. I assume she will more questions about it soon and I'm not really sure how to go about it exceot from a scientific veiwpoint. How do you explain the "difference" to 3 1/2 year old? Should she even really be questioning these things yet? I want to be specific and real. I want to give her the correct answers. Not some hogwash about the birds and the bees but when is it appropriate? If she's asking the questions is she ready to know?
Lisa...have you had this talk yet?
I'm just not sure what to do at this point. Being open about your body is one thing. I definitely want her to be comfortable and sure of herself. I never want to squash that. But this? Now? Already? WTF?!?! Help!!!!

I am currently out of commission with the rotavirus (correct spelling this time). I started feeling ill last night and spent the entire night pretty much praying to the porcelain gods.....yeck. I was only able to keep some soup down about an hour ago...still weak and feeling bleh.

The Puke of it all....

Little Miss Priss is sick sick sick. There has been a nasty stomach bug going around lately. It started with the baby room at daycare and has now moved on to us at home. Yay! I had it Saturday but it only lasted a few hours with me. Unfortunately my little angel cakes always gets hit hard with stomach bugs. When she was about a yr old she got a roto-virus that wiped her out completely. We visited the doctor numerous times to get shots for anti nausea. The highlight of that particular episode was the first day before I knew she was sick, I fed her blueberry yogurt. Not so pretty coming back up. It was purple curds all. over. the. place. The walls. The doors. The couch and the coup de grace, in my mouth. Yep. I was holding her, rocking her and she bolted up and exploded neon purple curds in my mouth. I immediately puked all over her. Take that roto-virus.
So far today I have been puked on twice and have managed to catch a fair amount in my poor wittle hands. Ewww.
Hopefully the throw up will end soon. She is miserable.

Ok...one more. I couldn't resist.
And yes. I eat food off the floor.

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For some reason it wouldn't let me comment on the video post. It kept kicking it back. Bleh.
Whatevs, you bitchy ass blog site.

Anyways. This is Jackerdoodles launching around the kitchen. Look closely and you will see a bonafide shiner! That's right. My kid almost knocked himself out falling onto the toilet. Hopefully not a sign of things to come.
Damn, he's cute but Oh my Gawd, my nerves!

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ARG!

This being without a job thing sucks. Bad. I'm completely sick of it and can't wait until I find something else to do. I'm so depressed and I feel like shit. ARG!

Do they make muzzles for three year olds?

Cause seriously I think I need to invest. My sanity is on the line people and quickly fading. I'm actually not sure anymore if the mommy's I hear day and NIGHT are real or if they could be echos of the incessant calls for me all. day. long. Ok...it's one thing to, you know, need me. I can totally handle the needs and most of the wants. But really. Do you need a drink every 5 minutes? Do you really need me to watch you run the same path fifty million times. In a row.
Our coloring conversation tonight went something like this:

C: Mommy, what are you coloring? ( as she looking directly at my care bear coloring book)
Me: A care bear, baby.
C: Why?
Me: Beacause you asked me to color with you and I like care bears. They're cute.
C: Oh. Are there any boys in the picture?
Me: I don't think so. See, care bears aren't gender specific. There are no boys and girls per say. They're just a bunch of cute cuddly bears who love to care and share. (I thought this would be it. Usually long answers with big words are the trick to ending an interrogation)
**Side note Like the time we had a discussion about penguins and she wanted to know why there aren't penguins in our ponds. I simply said "penguins aren't indigenous to tropical climates, therefore we can't have penguins in our ponds. END OF DISCUSSION. Win for me.**
C: Why do I have 5 greens in my coloring box?
Me: They are different shades of green. Blue green, jungle green, lime green, green green, and light green.
C: I don't know which green this one is.
Me: Jungle green
C: This one.
Me: Blue green.
C: This one.
Me: This is no longer fun Chloe.
C: Can I have cookies?
ARRRGGG!

This happens everyday. 5-sometimes 10 times a day. Almost every conversation with her is this. Don't get me wrong. I love that she's so curious about everything. I just can't wait until she can read some encyclopedias. And pour her own chocolate milk.

It's Been A Long Time....

I haven't really blogged in a while. You know, written something. Meaningful or otherwise. I've been way too busy with work and mothering to have the energy, mentally and physically, to do anything more than blather and bullshit. So, here I sit, without a job and babies in bed so what else do I do? Oh yeah..that thing I truly enjoy. Blog!
This will probably end up being a few entries in one. I guess that's what you get with limited time though. At least it's something. Right?
First things first. JACK IS WALKING! Um hello?? Did you hear me? Walking. Yes. that's. right. Fucking walking. Look right past the joy and "oh how cute!" 's to the oh shits and what am I going to now's. I have two. Yes. One, two mobile children. Greeeaaat. Uhuh. Baby-proofing starts anew and I will need a ready supply of zanax to keep me from having a complete nervous breakdown. We currently have a goose egg the size of a quarter due to this walking business. I am officially a wreck.
If I could turn back time...
If I could find a way...
How does this happen? This time flying by with barely a breath in between birth, walking and learning to use the word fuck eloquently and in perfect context. Um yeah. That last...yeah.
On to other business.
I had a blast on my cruise! We went to Cozumel and had our "Corona commercial" moments on a beautiful beach. Seriously, it was like being in our very own Corona commercial. Complete with a little Mexicano man named Manuel bringing us beer on ice and authentic quesadillas. Mmmm. Wonderful. Then we hit Carlos and Charlies where they do a shot called the Molesto. A blast! And there will always be "Aye Phillipe!" Hot. Brazilian. Morsel. Mmmm. Okay. Yep..back to reality. We spent much time at the casinos where I lost my ass on the slot machines. Evil little bastards, I say. We danced and consumed WAAY to much alchohol. It was loverly. Quite loverly. I did spend one night passed out on the bathroom floor of our cabin, if that says anything. I say, at least I made it back to the room. It could have been a public bathroom. That drunk.
Reporting on the joblessness aforementioned. The day after I got back from my cruise and went back to work...I got fired! By. my. sister. Looong story. All I can say about right now is. Beyotch, how can you be so shallow?
I have decided in this crossroad to go to college. Me, past drug user party girl extrodinaire, going to college. **Huge sigh of happiness.** This feels soo good. This choice. I'm ecstatic. Really. Jumping right now while typing. I'm a multi-tasking fool, yo!
One more thing..is there anybody out there? No comments lately..was just wondering if anyone even read this shit anymore...

Just some random pictures of the babies.....aren't they the cutest?