Saturday, February 24, 2007

The Good, The Bad & The Explanation of Body Parts

Ahem. Yes, those body parts.
I have always been very comfortable with my body. With nudity in general and have never had an issue with saying The Words. Vagina. Penis. Pussy. Cock. Whatever. Easy peasy, right?
I've been discriptive with Chloe and her body parts. In the bath when the soaping ensues, I've always named what I'm washing. Neck, arms, elbows, chest, belly, heiny, coochie/vagina (which when she said always came out badina. As in: Mommy, you're washing my badina!) Not really an issue. What I never considered was the impact this would have if I had a boy. The questions regarding his anatomy weren't really what crossed my mind when we found out there another baby on the way. Really, my only thought was, holy fucking shit! Not, how will explain the difference between a vagina and a penis. Which is what I had to do last night.
Oh yeah baby. I actually almost fainted when Chloe grabbed Jack's penis in the bathtub and said "Look at his coochie momma! It's different than mine..?" This of course was after her outburst last week of "Look momma! Jack's grabbing his balls!" Where she heard that and how she knew that, I do not know. I asked and she said "I don't know" The requisite answer to all things these days. I corrected her and said "No honey, They're called testicles. Jack has testicles." Omigawd!!!!
So, the look at his coochie exclamation was coming, I know but still quite shocking!
My answer: Honey you know that you're a girls and that Jack is a boy, right?
C: Yes
Okay, well besides Dna and hormones and such the main difference between boys and girls is, boys have a penis and girls have a vagina. See? Penis. Vagina.
C: Oh. Why?
Okay. Hmm...well. Inside our bodies we have Dna. That makes us who and what we are. That says if we are a boy or a girl. If we have blue eyes or brown eyes. See?
C: Yes (also requisite answer)
Are you sure?
C: No
Okay. Boys have a penis girls have a vagina. therefore, Jack cannot have a coochie. Okay?
C: Okay momma.
Whew!!! I'm sure more talks will be had. I assume she will more questions about it soon and I'm not really sure how to go about it exceot from a scientific veiwpoint. How do you explain the "difference" to 3 1/2 year old? Should she even really be questioning these things yet? I want to be specific and real. I want to give her the correct answers. Not some hogwash about the birds and the bees but when is it appropriate? If she's asking the questions is she ready to know?
Lisa...have you had this talk yet?
I'm just not sure what to do at this point. Being open about your body is one thing. I definitely want her to be comfortable and sure of herself. I never want to squash that. But this? Now? Already? WTF?!?! Help!!!!


Anonymous said...

There's lots of really good books out there for the 2 of you to read together. They range from 2 and up that you can explore together and help explain everything on thier level. Very helpful. Any major book store can help you out.

the weirdgirl said...

Um... I'm kind of hoping you parents with kids older than mine will have great tips for this!

Rebecca said...

Badina!!!! I love it!

You did great with the explanations, Summer!

On the bright side, I can't think of anyone more qualified to explain the birds and the bees to someone. ;-) I'm sure you'll manage just fine when he time comes.