I must confess (I have probably confessed this dozens of times on this blog) that I never truly realized what a frantic pace mothering would be. Never really thought about it actually. Got pregnant. Had baby. Got pregnant again. Had another baby. Frantic life ensues and just when I think it can't possibly get crazier than this (and no, I am not preggers again), the pace picks up.
Little Miss I Have Sass for your Ass has taken a no prisoners outlook on life right now. She is almost 4 (next month) and going through a very strenuous, for me, change. She hit the terrible twos early, ok, I thought, I can deal with a child that screams for anything and everything louder than foghorns. I can deal with tantrums and biting. I cannot deal with The Sass and The Whys. It has taken over and OMG! I seriously feel like some Exorcist shit is going on over here.
Anyway, a really funny thing happened today. I picked my Grams up to take her to the eye doctor, we went out for lunch (BBQ) and on to doctor's office. Once we were in the exam room, Chloe had to sit on my lap...remember, we had BBQ for lunch. She straddled my legs and sat calmly for all of like 10 seconds and she started fidgeting. Lean to the left. Now to the right. Now slide your butt, up to mom's face. Now down again. Now fart. Loudly. Yep. Not just a little one either. One that lasted a good while with little bumps. BBBPH.bmp bmp bmp BBBPH. bmp bmp bmp. And oh the stench. It filled up the room. It stuck to my pants. It made my eyes water and my nose run. All I could do was laugh hysterically while trying to choke out to her to please not do that again. She looked at me with big brown eyes and loudly proclaimed, "I farted!" As if everyone in the room didn't already know.
2 comments:
That is hilarious. She's so your daughter, Summer. I can't believe it is almost four years ago she came into the world. What an amazing day that was!
See, I can't handle the biting, I have ISSUES with it! And yes, I'm smack in the middle of that stage. It just totally fucks up my day. He's just started throwing himself on the ground, too, but that I can just walk away from.
I live in fear of the farting stage. God, I hope he doesn't take after his father!
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