Friday, March 20, 2009

Life moves along...

at a pace that is so fast and at the same time so slow. I feel like I haven't had the time to breathe lately much less do anything else. Being a single mom is hard work. Two full-time jobs fill my days and nights with so many things to do...but I have to say that even though I'm relentlessly busy, I've never been happier. I absolutely love my job, the only thing that keeps me from truly looking forward to going each day is knowing I will be leaving my little angels. They are growing up so fast! Chloe is 5 1/2 and Jack just turned 3! I have no idea where those years went...they're just...gone. Flown past me.

My divorce will be final the end of May. Thankfully we have settled into a routine and a relationship that is conducive to co-parenting our kids. The anger is gone and we can finally see the person we were once such good friends with and the person we once fell in love with. A HUGE move for us especially considering we have FINALLY realized that no matter the love we may feel for each other, we can never be together as husband and wife. We don't mix well in that setting but we do make amazing friends and parents from different households. It's so sad at times to see him and know that the life I built around him is gone forever. I am so much happier but it has left an empty spot in my heart. We're both moving on, dating new people and striking out into the world as divorcees and single parents. A world so foreign to both of us and hard to swallow sometimes. I think (and know for me) that seeing one another spending time with a new person, filling in the spot we once occupied for one another, is fucking HARD. But for the best. He has become my best friend and I his. The "go-to" for each other and this role is what we were meant for. It just took years to realize that.

The future looks bright with promises of new experiences and happiness. Growing happy children and a life not being spent in unhappiness and misery.


Anonymous said...

Glad to read that things are turning around for you and your family. Awesome news.


Anonymous said...

How are things with Bo?

the weirdgirl said...

I'm so glad you and your ex have gotten back to being best friends. That's so much better than being angry, and knowing your kids are caught in the middle of it. It's strange how relationships can come full circle, isn't it?

Congrats on loving your job, too. It sounds like everything is looking up!

Christina said...

found your blog and im following....but you said you started a new one?

im in north florida too. palm coast!

im at if you want to add me back.